Poem: English Department

This is a poem I wrote about the English department at my school as well as my personal experiences with the teachers that are in it. Tell me what you think. Sound off below. 

         The English Department

English used to be my favorite subject

Now I stare at the clock, spend my time writing through it

Because we never write in it

Year after year

Teachers with tenure

The way you can tell is that they do nothing

Find countless, creative ways to sit on their butts

If you want someone good in the English Department, you have to hand pick'em

Don't even get me started on that pathetic English curriculum

Written by an idiot who doesn't like English

5th grade was my hardest English class

It's gotten progressively easier, what's up with that

My 5th grade teacher was demanding and tough

But I actually learned something, she didn't make my life rough

6th grade teacher was new, so I give her a break

7th grade teacher told stories about her life, the whole year was a break

8th grade teacher, even worse he went insane

My mom complained about the curriculum

Didn't even mention him

Yet he still tried to fail me

Then I took a day of silence for the LGBT's

And what did he do, threaten to phone my mother on me

My mother never believes in calling someone names

 But she referred to him as "that stupid shmuckface"

Apparently someone told him off, he excitedly exclaimed

And that poor kid never took the podium with his friends to graduate

Then I wrote a research paper for the guy, he told me my opinion was wrong

Out of all my bad English teachers, he was the worst ding-dong

9th grade teacher, easy and

pregnant

I told my great aunt, a former English teacher what little we did

 She looked so green, I thought she was going to be sick

My mom said I could have gotten an A with my eyes closed

How I missed half the school year and got a 95, I really don't know

How that was called Honors, God only knows

This year I ask my friend what I missed she says "Nothing.", "I don't know."

With your lackluster contribution, teaching has hit a newfound low

Compared to the education my mom got 30 years ago

10th grade English teacher, good gracious, oy vey

Sat on his ass, as we slept through class

A second study hall for me

Learned what a superlative is from my Spanish teacher

We write more in history

I know much more Spanish and Italian grammar

¿Tienes la clase de inglés? Sí, pero hacemos muy poco.

¡Estoy sentado en inglés, creo que me volveré loco!

Where are the good English teachers, lost in 1,000 B.C.

Can you come back to 2013, so one might find me?

The English department is a well known joke

The English department is full of lazy folk

One of my homebound tutors said this quote

 "The English department, what a despicable joke!"

The English department leaves me dry and uninspired

Most of the English department should be pink slipped and fired

Luckily, I don't want to be an English major

I've witnessed many prime examples of how not to be an English teacher

As disliked as she was, you could learn a lot from my 5th grade English teacher